It's a brand new day!

What I Want...

I've decided to do a post on things that I want to know, do or see. The following post is going to be about things that I want to know, see or do. This post will be a way for me to set goals and stick to them. I plan on posting this and coming back to it in 3 months, 6 months, a year, etc. and see how far I've come in my master plan to do the things I want and accomplish the goals I've set!

Here are the rules:
-There are no time frames set. This means I don't have to do it in a month or 2, not even a year. Just whenever....thats when I plan on doing it!
-There is not limit on the number. Yes, thats right-there is no limit to the number of things I can put on my list.
-There must be descriptions of every event, wish, idea, thing I put on my list. Each description has to detail exactly what I wish to happen.


Here we go-

1. Loose Weight
I need to loose about 75 lbs. to be considered healthy. I intend to do just that. I have a great partner in Fantastagirl, and together we will overcome being chunky! Girl Power! :-)

2. Finish my Associates Degree
I've never lost track of this, as I have been working on it non-stop since I graduated from High School in 2004. The only hurdle I've come across recently is finding courses that are offered when I can take them. I am going to take courses at a different community college this summer and transfer them into the college I'm currently going to- one way or another I will finish this degree and get to work on my bachelors degree.

3. Repaint my Hallway
Pam and I had a conversation about this over the weekend. Right now my hallway is a princess pink color with sponge painted purple and blue daises. Without a doubt, this is adorable! However, I would like a change. I want to paint the whole hallway white and put pale blue and purple stripes. I want each stripe to be about 4-5 inches wide and evenly spaced apart. I know this will not be an easy task, but Pam and I have decided that we are capable and we will do it!

4. Finish my Bathroom
I have the oldest, ugliest bathroom in the world. It's got white walls, but about 1/2 way up the wall are hideous blue and black tiles. I hate them! I have to figure out a color or something to paint the upper portion of the wall to take away from the hideous tiles. I tired a busy shower curtain, but I didn't like it. I ended up buying this pretty plain white shower curtain with a design on it in all white. It's really 'crisp' and clean looking in there, I just have to figure out what to do with those walls.

5. Re-Arrange my Bedroom and LEAVE it for more then 2 months!
I really want to re-arrange my bedroom. I want to be able to sit in my living room and look back the hallway into my bedroom and see nothing. I want it to look spotless. Right now my bed comes out in the middle of the room where my door is. It's not bad, but I have to make my bed everyday, otherwise the entire room looks trashed. I've got to figure out something to do with my computer desk so it all fits nicely in my bedroom.

6. Let GO of my Flaws!
I tend to be a little to hard on myself sometimes. I really really liked who I was when I was a happy 135-140. Lately, I feel like I have been hating my self. I don't like that feeling at all. I feel lazy and ugly a lot, and thats rare for me. I am generally very outgoing.

7. Get out of this "relationship"
Thats right, I want to get as far away from Michael as possible. I was walking to lunch and thinking, I control my destiny and I really need to start exercising my right to control it. I have a lot going for myself and I really want to continue on the positive track I'm on. I feel like remaining in a relationship that is emotionally stressful is to much for me right now. I have enough stress on me with work, school and being a young adult, I don't need him too. I love him, but I think that right now our lives are in different places. I'm in college, working full time, driving a brand new car and living on my own. He works full time, drives a ratty truck and a new Harley, barely makes enough money to pay his bills, lives with his parents, is in credit card debt like nobody I've ever seen, and has no real intentions of changing his life. My usual plans for the weekend consist of homework, studying, cleaning house, family vacations, hanging out or shopping with friends, washing my car ect. His weekend plans are to catch up on sleep and get drunk. SO NOT ME!

8. Pay off My Debts
I don't have a lot of debt, but I don't like debt at all (who does?) so I don't want to be in it at all! I have 2 credit cards that in total I owe $1000 on, I have medical bills from when I went to the emergency room in Jan. that total $800 and I owe my parents around $300. I want to pay, pay, pay until I owe no more! When I get my taxes back this year, I bought stuff I needed and paid my parents money I owed them. I was in the hole with them around $800 and I got it down to $300. I'm making steps! :-) The loan for my new car is in my brothers name and I am the second one on it. In the next 2 weeks, (probably next week) I am going to go to the credit union and apply for a loan so I can refinance it in my name only. He wants to buy a house in December when his girlfriend moves down, and I am afraid with my car on his credit, they won't let him get a loan to buy a $130,000 house. I would hate to hold him back, he's been good to me!

9. Organize my life & my surroundings better
I am quite obsessive about some things. Like I hate clutter. I like to have everything put away. My general rule of thumb is "If it doesn't have a place, find one or throw it out". My mom laughs at how much of a freak I am about cleaning now, because when I lived with her I was quite the opposite. I have Rubbermaid containers of stuff from when I was a child in her basement. I really need to go through these things, organize and throw out. I hate to do it because some of that stuff is hard to part with.

10. Re-evaluate My Choices
I know this is a really broad topic, but I didn't know exactly how to title it. I have been having a hard time with this one. What I mean by this topic is, to make a plan and be sure its what I want. I need to re-evaluate some of my decisions and be sure they are what I want and what I need. This is such a confusing topic. Let me see if I can explain it more. I am friends with Rebeka who is 26. I am 20. Generally when it comes to me and my friends age isn't an issue. But with Rebeka it is. She treats me like I am her daughter or something. She acts like its her job to tell me what to do and how to do it. I don't feel like I should have to 'put up' with a friend like this, but in the same hand its not that bad. Maybe I just need to call her out on it next time she does it and tell her I don't like it. Like when we went to the beach at the end of March, when we got back she sent my Mom an e-mail, and in the e-mail she wrote "Ashley was good this weekend." That aggravates the crap out of me. Also, she doesn't invite me to hang out with her. Like this weekend, they had a party at her house. The theme of the party was Easter and it sounded like fun, but she didn't invite me. I asked my mom why she thought that was and we both came to the conclusion that it was my age. I don't mind that I wasn't invited, especially since I had my teeth yanked out, but this happens quite frequently. Another good example would be Beth. I love her to death and we have been friends forever, but her immaturity gets on my last nerve sometimes. She is so fake about things. She has to have name brand and she doesn't think sensibly. The good thing about her is when I think she is making a mistake I can tell her about it and she will take my opinion in mind. It doesn't mean she will use it, but she will atleast accept it and think about it. I don't want to sound like a bitch, but I was raised to be intelligent, independent, and smart about the ways of the world. I hate it when people think that 'everything will work out' without any work at all. SOAPBOX ENDED!

This is still very much under construction and I will be coming back to it frequently. Stay Tuned!

posted by Ashley at 9:38 AM